SHHHH, don't TELL anyone

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The day I wondered about has finally happened. Someone I have plans to meet with read my blog before our first meet. I'm not sure what or how many entries he read, but he did let me know that he read at least one.

I was very honest in my reply to him. I let him know I do not name names or handles when writing. I feel very strongly about this. I would never identify anyone. I have had in the past two people who identified themselves as the person I wrote about. They did so in comments to a blog entry. It was their choice, I did not ask that they reveal themselves.

This is my diary and I am very open with the information I share about myself. I told the guy I was very sexually active and do schedule multiple meets on the same day. I have never tried to hide who I am or what I do.

I have promised him though if he still wants to meet, which will be his choice, that I would keep that day for him only. He would have to promise to keep the meet in return. I would really like to meet him. As many of you know I am not a game player. When I say I will meet someone it is reserved for that one person only. I also never ask anyone to promise or be obligated for sex. It has to be a choice between the two of us, something both want and are willing to proceed with.

One of my January guys has come through and we will meet next week. Also have a new guy for tomorrow, hard to believe I found someone available on a Saturday. The other new guy who was ill and I just talked to, wants to meet again. My life is remaining the same, new guys and ones I have been with before.

Looking back I remember the first guy I fell for, it was somewhere in between lust and love and then the second one, I fell for him in a big way. Although I am very busy sexually, most of the men I see are married or attached. I keep on wondering if I will ever meet the one, someone single, sexually compatible and someone to care for. That would be my true challenge in life.

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January Bill Blues

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It is the start of a new year and with that all of the hopes and dreams of starting afresh are alive and well. If you're real lucky you are still following through on the resolutions. Me, I've given that up.

The real bad thing about the start of the new year is that it really seems like that is when the bills really pile up. First there is the left over Christmas expenses. Always seem to spend more than I planned and those credit card bills are kind of a shock in January.

Then, there are the medical bills. New lab work, doctor's appointments, and specialists to see. Prescriptions need to be filled. Of course there deductable on the insurance starts anew and the bills have to be paid up front. So all of those bills pile up.

The kids start back to College so there are tuition, books, and fees to pay. Having two of them going to College is a real financial drain. Not to mention they are out of money from the holidays and need some help. Their jobs don't seem to cover the expenses. They have to eat don't they?

Got insurance bills on the car and then taxes will be coming due. All of the regular bills don't go away. They come due as well.

It is no wonder that I couldn't ever keep new year's resolutions. The bills through me into shock and then it was real easy to slip back. Oh, I know what you are thinking. That is all just a bunch of rationalization for not having will power. Well it may be, but it is pretty good rationalizetion, isn't it????

I just have to remember that paying bills means that someone else gets to get paid so they can pay their bills. Maybe their bills go to pay some of my paycheck. Well there you have it. We are just trading money back in forth. I think it gives the illusion that we are keeping our heads above water.

OK, enough procrastination, I'm off to pay some bills. Better check the bank account first. Don't need any extra costs for bouncing checks . . . lol

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